Appearances of evil is a term Odi’s Mum uses to explain situations that appear evil but aren’t actually evil. I guess we’ve all been in situations where our character appears evil, but we know deep down that we are not bad people. People tend to judge us based on our physical appearances and how we choose to express ourselves and that doesn’t define us.
People have, from time to time judged me for wanting to dye my hair blonde and wearing an anklet. Hell! They even judged me for fixing artificial nails. I was shocked when, one day someone called me a Benin girl because I fixed long nails – I don’t fix often, but when I do, I like them long (no offence to Benin girls). I jokingly replied that Benin girls are pretty so whatever, but I knew deep down that what he meant to say was why do you look like a hoe – cause that’s the general false perception about Benin girls.
For years, I found it rather difficult to be myself. Instead of concentrating on being who I want to me, I found myself trying to conform to society’s standards. I would want to appear like the typical good girl in order to avoid judgements. I would remove my anklets and earrings whenever I felt like I’d run into a judge Judy A.K.A my mum’s friends. I would squirm in my sit and try to hide my ankles or freak out in my head over my exposed ears and six piercings.
Now let me introduce Tobi 2.0, the new and improved version of myself. This version of me doesn’t care about anybody’s opinion about my physical appearance and what not. For almost a year now, I’ve continued to grow a thicker skin. I now know how to shut people’s opinions out and ignore their side comments. My hair or anklets or piercings don’t define me. They don’t make me a bad person and they definitely don’t make me a hoe.
Have you ever being misjudged because of your appearance and how you choose to express yourself? I’d like to know, cause I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one with the problem.
Thanks for stopping by.